What Women Want
by Lord Augustus
Summary: Tenchi Masaki has tried so hard to return his life into something resembling normalcy. Unfortunately for him, everything will be turned upside down as he gains a mysterious and terrible power: the ability to hear what women are thinking...
1. No need for electricity!

Legal Disclaimer: I think it's obvious I don't own Tenchi. If I did, then I wouldn't very well be writing fanfiction would I?

Note: This is my first Tenchi fic, so I'm bound to get a few details wrong. Also, I could never ever claim to know what people think or desire, much less women. If you want to get technical on me, then it's in an alternate universe.

Rated R for swearing. People swear more often in their head than they do out in the open, so it might make some of the characters seem out of character.

**  
What Women Want**

A _Tenchi_ _Muyo_ fic by Lord Augustus

****

**_  
Chapter One: No need for electricity!_**

**  
Okayama, Japan: the Masaki Household **

The day started out nice and clear, with the sun rising and turning the sky many brilliant colors. Orange light flooded the Masaki household, forcing those still asleep to get up and face the morning. Grudgingly, and at a snail's pace, the house's occupants began their daily routines.

Slowly, the temperature itself began to rise, making the air nice and hot. Humidity levels went up dramatically, distorting the sun's rays and making waves appear in the air.

Into this summer cauldron stepped young Tenchi Masaki, after eating a hearty breakfast of course. He felt good today, and quite confident and sure of himself, something Tenchi hadn't felt in quite awhile.

The harvest was finally ready, and he had strapped a large wicker basket to his back. In his hands, Tenchi carried several aged tools used for digging and scraping. They had belonged to his grandfather, and he took great care of them, never leaving them outside or letting them get very rusty.

Tenchi closed the door behind him amidst several people yelling all at once. He could hear what sounded like Ryoko and Ayeka screaming at each other. Dishes crashing and breaking, bodies hitting the floor, the unmistakable yelp a girl makes when her hair is pulled and other noises had become common nowadays.

When the girls had first joined him, it had been like a roller coaster ride every minute of everyday. Constant infighting had nearly driven him insane. Lucky for him, he dug deep and found the courage to persevere through the many situations the ladies had dragged him into. But in the end, the experiences had changed him for the better, and he now felt much closer to all of them.

Having beautiful alien women fawn over him every ten minutes was stressing, but at the same time, very pleasant.

By now, Tenchi was in college, studying to be an architect like his father. The girls were painfully jealous of any other women he might happen to meet, so they kept close tabs on him. More than once Ryoko had magically phased into his dorm room, hovering over his bed as he slept. Usually Ayeka would storm in right after that, and there would be quite literally, a royal catfight.

It was summer now though, and Tenchi was back home. The girls could swoon over him twenty-four hours a day now without interrupting his studies. Truthfully, he didn't mind it that much anymore.

Of course, he still wanted a little bit of time away from the circus.

Leaving the bickering ladies behind, Tenchi headed for the fields.

**

* * *

  
A few hours later

**

_"I love this Garden Claw," _Tenchi thought to himself as he jammed it into the ground once more. _"It pops the carrots right out! I'm glad grandfather decided to buy this thing…"_

He thrust the end of it into the ground and twisted it, producing a bright orange carrot from the dirt. Picking it up, he placed it in the basket, which was now practically overflowing with vegetables.

Standing and stretching for a moment, Tenchi reflected on his relatively uneventful day.

_"Ahh, this is pretty good. I haven't had it this quiet in a long time," _thought the young man. _"Yeesh, I've never been able to get this many carrots pulled at once. Maybe I could do this more often if I understood the girls better."_

Tenchi scratched his neck and laughed to himself out loud.

"_Ha!_Who could _ever_ understand what women want?" he said.

For the next five minutes, Tenchi repeated the process of harvesting carrots. Eventually, it got so full that he couldn't fit even a single extra carrot in the basket. Done with his fieldwork for the day, he grabbed the lid and put it on top, pushing the mass of vegetables down to make as much room as possible.

As he slung the wicker basket over his shoulders and picked up his tools, Tenchi stared lazily up towards the sky. He'd been staring at the ground for so long he had almost forgotten what it looked like.

What he did remember was that it definitely hadn't been gloomy in the morning.

Almost the entire expanse of the sky was now a drab, boring shade of gray. Directly above his head was a great mass of black, the only other color the sky seemed to be. Tenchi had been so totally absorbed in his work that he barely noticed that the weather had turned foul.

It was freezing cold now, and the wind was blowing hard. The young man felt something tiny sting the back of his neck. He could tell it was wet, and that it would be best for him to leave as soon as possible.

A few raindrops began to fall around him before turning into a drizzle, then immediately into a torrent of water.

In a flash, poor Tenchi was soaked to the bone.

He had never seen a storm of this magnitude develop so quickly, and knew he needed to get back to the house. If he didn't, the rain could ruin half a season's worth of carrots. Tenchi grabbed all his tools, shifted the basket of carrots, and darted down the road at top speed.

Running at full tilt, his legs were kicking up all sorts of mud and dirt, covering him in grime. Now he was dirty, and would need to take a shower, yet another thing on his daily list of things to do.

All he could do was run and curse himself for not paying attention to the morning weather forecasts.

Pumping his legs as fast as they would go Tenchi got closer and closer to the Masaki household. In just a few more seconds, he would be inside where it was nice and warm and safe. He would soon be sitting in front of the television with a nice cup of tea, watching the Space Police Policemen marathon with the girls.

Unfortunately, it was never to be.

Tenchi didn't think twice as he stepped into what appeared to be just another puddle. His left leg sunk deep into the muddy water, and because he'd been running so fast, his right stretched far out in front of him.

His lack of judgment was apparent, as the ground instantly seemed to reach up and strike him in the face.

The Prince of Jurai had gotten his left foot caught in a pothole.

Tenchi hit the dirt hard, his tools and the carrots flying in all different directions.

For a second, it hurt to move. The pain was marginal though, and Tenchi quickly got to his feet. Looking around, he saw his grandfather's precious garden tools strewn about the area.

Seeing that he was close to his house, Tenchi made a fast decision. It was becoming dangerous outside, especially where he was standing. The storm even seemed to be closing in on him, trying its best to injure him in some way.

It was doing a good job for the most part, as the grime covered Tenchi was slipping all over the wet grass, desperately searching for the rather expensive Garden Claw. The young man had gathered most of the other tools, but desperately needed that last one, which he wasn't going to leave without.

He spotted its metallic gleam off to his left, lying in a ditch.

Bending over, Tenchi picked it up and quickly examined it. Seeing that it wasn't broken, he started to run back to the house.

Poor Tenchi didn't get very far.

A sharp pain jutted all down the length of his spine, followed by an intense heat that radiated throughout his body. His vision blurred, but not before a bright light flashed before his eyes. Tenchi could feel his hair suddenly stand on end, giving him the horrible feeling that he was being electrocuted.

At that point, the world turned black.

The young prince then slumped forward and became one with the rain-filled ditch.

* * *

**Quite a number of hours later…**

"Uuuuuuggggh…" Tenchi groaned. "What happened? Where am I?"

He tried to get up, but couldn't.

There was no more pain, only a sense of bewilderment.

His eyes soon focused, and he saw that a puddle of muddy water was only a few inches from his face. When Tenchi thought about it, he realized that his head had been in it the whole time.

Through sheer force of will, the young man sat up. He had no idea how long he'd been lying in the goopy muck, not that it was much of a concern to his bug-addled brain..

Glancing around the area and looking up at the sky, Tenchi noticed that the sun had long since gone down. The late afternoon storm had vanished, leaving only the blanket of stars up above.

It was still rather warm out, and if he hadn't been so dirty, he might say that it was rather pleasant.

Very slowly, Tenchi pulled himself to his feet. Immediately the blood rushed to his brain, making the world spin around rapidly. He fought for control of his legs, and after a violent struggle, won. Quite shakily, Tenchi started towards the Masaki household, his knees shaking the entire way.

By now he had given up on his grandfather's digging tools.

Tenchi stumbled up the porch steps and opened the screen

Inside, the smoldering Tenchi could have sworn a train had run through his living room.

Bodies were strewn everywhere, some on the couch, others on the floor. All of them were bent into some rather odd positions.

The television flickered, showing a dozen or so random images of the Space Police Policemen marathon. On the coffee table, four empty bottles of sake and many more shot glasses lay on their sides.

Even little Sasami was out cold, sleeping peacefully on one of the ottomans, her legs curled up to her chest. It was doubtful that the others let a young child like her have any alcohol. More than likely she had fallen asleep while waiting for Tenchi to come back.

The young Juraian hadn't a clue as to how long he'd been gone, and noticed the flashing lights on top of the television.

Avoiding Ryoko and Ayeka, who were passed out drunk on the floor, Tenchi walked over to the television set and checked the time on the DVD player.

"_Twelve thirty-five?!_ How _long_ was I out?!" he yelled, breaking the quiet of the night.

No one heard him, at least no one other than Mihoshi.

Officer First Class Mihoshi quietly stirred and awoke. Holding her head in agony, she struggled to sit up in her armchair. Her blonde hair looked to be quite frizzled, with lots of splits ends sticking out in all directions. It was obvious she'd been involved in this little night of binge-drinking.

_"Oh my fucking head! No more drinking contests, EVER!"_ she said, or so it would seem.

To Tenchi, her voice sounded very far off, like an echo inside a cathedral. Despite that, it had come in loud and clear, so there was nothing wrong with his hearing.

Or was there?

"What was that?" Tenchi asked her.

Mihoshi looked to be confused.

"Huh?" she replied

"What did you say?"

"I said 'Huh?'"

"What did you say before that?"

"Master Tenchi, I haven't said anything at all. My head…like…hurts…in a bad way…"

This was starting to get weird. The Juraian prince would bet his spiffy new DVD player that she had made some comment about a drinking contest. Nothing was really registering in his brain, not since several gigawatts of electricity passed through his body.

Ignoring Tenchi completely, the police officer with the perfect tan flipped over in her chair and closed her eyes. Tenchi turned off the television and started to walk past her up towards his room.

"I hope you guys clean this up by the time I wake up tomorrow," he said when he reached the stairs. "It looks like a car accident in here."

As he trudged up the stairs, the young man heard Mihoshi's voice once more.

_"Screw that! Leeveme lone! Tellin' me what to do...who does he think he is...?"_

Tenchi picked that up loud and clear.

"Hey! I can hear you!" he yelled. "I'm not deaf!"

Again, no one heard him, so he continued up the stairs and went to bed.

**  
End Chapter One**

****

**_Proceed to Chapter Two!_**

****

_  
  
-Did you know I am a pioneer? __I'm out on a secret mission! _

_I travel the galaxy and far beyond!-_


	2. No need for maple syrup!

**_Chapter Two: No need for maple syrup!_**

**  
The next morning**

After tossing and turning all night, Tenchi finally awoke to the glaring rays of the sun coming in through his bedroom. The light burned into the back of his head, no matter how hard he tried to cover his eyes. Every single part of his body ached, like a constant dull toothache spread all over. He really, really didn't want to move at all, but the alarm clock next to his bed was producing the most irritating noise.

"So much for sleeping in…" Tenchi grumbled as he hit the off button on the clock. "Not today, I guess…"

Slowly but surely, Tenchi pulled himself out of bed. He searched his dresser and found a white t-shirt. Throwing it on, he stumbled out into the hallway.

Just before he could get into the bathroom, Washu appeared atop the stairs. She was dressed in a skintight, green jumpsuit that looked like an engineer's uniform, only tighter. As the self proclaimed greatest-scientific-genius-of-the-universe, she always tried to get Tenchi alone so she could attempt her strange, erotic experiments on him, all "in the name of science". Often, she got interesting results, as long as Ayeka or Ryoko didn't barge in and disrupt the whole process.

Right now, she was doing her laundry. In her arms, she held a basket filled with clothes and towels that she had retrieved from the dryer.

Washu spotted the young prince in the hallway and strolled over to where he was, doing her best to look pretty for him.

After getting a good look at Tenchi, she realized the he didn't look so hot. His face appeared grubby and his body quite dirty. Tenchi looked like he had been rolling around in the mud all night and all morning.

He certainly felt like it, too.

"Oh, hello little Washu," said Tenchi, holding onto the wall for support.

The young prince was painfully groggy, and his head felt twice its normal size. If he could at least take a shower, then perhaps he might feel well enough to make it through the day. Managing a weak smile, Tenchi headed for the bathroom.

Washu halted him before he could take a single step.

"Do you want a towel Tenchi-chan?" she asked.

The redhead grabbed a pink towel out of the basket and held it out for him.

_"Come on, take it,"_ said a voice.

It sounded exactly like the scientist, but it couldn't have been. Washu hadn't moved her mouth at all. She was simply standing there, holding her arm out and grinning at him.

_"Ugh, he smells like burnt toast. He hasn't showered in days! It's not like Tenchi to let himself get this bad. Oh, I hope he takes this thing soon before I pass out."_

The young man's eyes grew wide in shock.

Was he supposed to hear that?

What was it in the first place?

Why should he of, all people, start hearing voices?

In sort of a daze, Tenchi stepped away from the scientist. He noticed that while she was smiling, Washu didn't appear to be breathing. Her face turned a bright shade of red, then slowly into a faint blue. She quickly handed him the towel, still giving him the odd look.

_"He stinks! Finally, now I can go! I'll figure out why he smells later."_

"I'll see you later my little guinea pig," Washu gushed, pinching his cheek.

With a girlish laugh, she started to walk away, laundry basket in hand. The scientist was trying hard not to be disgusted, but couldn't help it, and wiped the hand that touched his face on her pants.

Tenchi stood there dumbfounded for a moment, trying desperately to understand what had happened. Washu had not moved her lips even a millimeter, yet he heard every single utterance. It was the single strangest experience in his life.

That's saying a lot for a guy like Tenchi.

He had been to the farthest reaches of the galaxy, to strange worlds uncharted.

He had fought with Kagato, evil overlord and scourge of the universe, defeating him in a blaze of glory.

Tenchi had seen things that mortal men could never fathom, strange, horrible, wonderful, beautiful things. All of his experiences and perceptions couldn't change reality, but only color it. Young Tenchi was about to see the spectrum clearer than he ever had in the past.

When the realization hit, he nearly had a heart attack.

Slamming the door, he locked himself in the bathroom, determined not to come out for quite a while.****

* * *

  
A few minutes later… 

After taking a shower, Tenchi put on a bathrobe and sat on the edge of the tub. Quite clean now, he tried to sort out the mixture of sensations that had bombarded him.

The first sensation was pain. His headache had yet to leave, even after a hot shower. Tenchi stood and walked over to the medicine cabinet, grabbed some aspirin, and swallowed it. Often times, aspirin was the only thing that kept him going. It was certainly a life-saver in a situation like this.

The second thing Tenchi felt was confusion. Blasts of evil energy had knocked him senseless many times before, but even they didn't come close to this. Tenchi put his head in his hands and stared at the floor, trying to make sense of it all.

After a little while, the medicine kicked in, and clarity came with it.

He understood completely now. What had eluded him before now made the most perfect sense.

Tenchi could hear what women were thinking.

Such an awesome power could not be taken lightly, and he wasn't quite sure he wanted it. He had often heard that ignorance could be blissful. However, Tenchi soon remembered that he had practically asked for this, and figurative storm clouds gathered over his head, threatening to rain on his parade. The young Juraian had been perfectly happy not knowing anything about the women in his house.

One woman was good enough for him, but five was an unnecessary tax on the mind and body.

He preferred to learn about them individually, without any mind games or tricks, and had been through many, many adventures that had bought each one of them a special place in his heart.

And so, Tenchi was positive that he didn't want to know what any of them were really thinking.

He almost slapped himself for asking for this burden in the field.

Before the young prince could do that, a familiar voice rang loud in his ears.

"_Hi Tenchi!_" yelled Ryoko.

It scared the living daylights out of him

She wasn't even in the room completely. Her head and shoulders were sticking out of the floor where she had phased in. The cyan haired beauty tilted her head and stared at him unassumingly.

_"I could almost see up his robe from here. Maybe I'll just take a quick peek."_

Tenchi turned five different shades of red, his eyes showing his embarrassment. He tried to contemplate the number of times Ryoko might have spied on him in the shower and found the number to be incalculable.

"Bah! Ryoko! _Get out!_"Tenchi finally yelled, wrapping his bathrobe tighter around his body.

The former space pirate quietly grinned back at him. As beautiful and sensual as ever, Ryoko was clad in a gray kimono with a bright red and yellow sash tied around her waist. As always, the young Juraian had to fight the urge to leer at her seductive form.

"Calm down Tenchi, it's not like I haven't seen you naked before," she said in her most sultry voice.

"But you can't just come in here!" he replied. "I'm in the _bathroom!_"

_"Whatever. I'll just watch him change later tonight. Damn him for being so attractive."_

"Whatever, my Tenchi. I just came to tell you that breakfast will be ready in a few minutes," Ryoko said nonchalantly.

The dark haired prince gazed into her shimmering, honey colored eyes. He never really meant to put Ryoko off as much as he did. Tenchi enjoyed her company a thousand times more than he let on, but their time together was almost always interrupted by one of the other girls, Ayeka by far the most often.

Still, he loved the way she carried herself. Ryoko's brazen attitude, her devil-may-care approach towards life, was the cause of all sorts of exciting adventures. Despite her energy, the thing that scared Tenchi a little was the way she flirted, which could best be described as obsessive.

Ryoko was madly in love with him, and never hesitated to show it.

_"What a loose robe. I knew it, I can see it. Christ it's hu…"_

"Ryoko, _go away!_ I'll be down in a minute!" Tenchi exclaimed, interrupting her thought process.

With a rather sad look on her face, Ryoko disappeared back underneath the floor. Tenchi hadn't meant to hurt her, but his expressions often did just that. Needing to apologize, he put on a fresh pair of clothes and practically ran out the door.

Even with his newfound powers, he'd never understand Ryoko.

****

****

****

****

****

**

* * *

**

**Downstairs: in the kitchen**

Feeling bold, Tenchi neared the entrance to the kitchen. He expected to hear shouts, arguments, and glass breaking into millions of tiny pieces.

Essentially, he expected the general sounds of people fighting.

However, there was nothing. Nobody was yelling or screaming or fighting over the last few scraps of food. Everything was perfectly serene.

Though Ryoko was in the kitchen, the wafting smells of breakfast cooking were absent. She seemed to be the only one in there, the other girls gone for some reason. He was glad no one was around, it would give the two of them a chance to be alone for a few minutes at least.

Tenchi crept in, being careful not to make even the slightest noise.

Ryoko was standing over the toaster. She put in two, circular yellow objects, pushed the lever, and sat back against the counter to wait.

As he got closer, Tenchi could hear what she was thinking.

_"Na na na na na na na na waffles, waffles, waffles!"_ the song went in her head.

He didn't know whether to find that funny or disturbing. The prince didn't know Ryoko had seen any of the campy, go-go music filled Batman episodes, especially since they hadn't aired on television in close to twenty years.

What freaked Tenchi out even more was that it was still playing in her mind.

_"Na na na na na na na na na waffles, Batman, TENCHI!"_

Spinning round, Ryoko instantly focused all her energies on Tenchi, who had frozen in his tracks. The second he was in the kitchen, the beautiful pirate could sense he was there. Ryoko had always been uniquely tuned into Tenchi, her connection so strong that she could always tell where he'd been or when he entered a room, no matter how silent he'd been. She tousled her hair a bit, then walked over and wrapped her arms around him.

"Morning, Tenchi-chan. Feeling better?" Ryoko whispered into his ear.

"Uhh, I'm fine Ryoko...just fine," he stammered.

"That's wonderful Tenchi, absolutely wonderful!" she replied.

As far as he knew, her cheeriness was sincere. Ryoko was well known to be a bad morning person, the kind who couldn't function without a pot of coffee. Yet here she was, just as lively as ever, groping Tenchi at the unheard of nine-thirty in the morning.

"Um, where's everyone else?" asked the Juraian prince.

Ryoko simply hugged him even harder.

_"Who could possibly care? This is great! Nobody to bother us,"_ she thought. _"I'm so glad I cheated…"_

"Sasami and Mihoshi are still sleeping," Ryoko sighed. "Washu is somewhere around here, and Her Highness found it in her royal heart to pick all the carrots in the driveway."

"Carrots? In the driveway?" he asked.

"Yeah. You're pretty clumsy when it comes to those," she answered

The pirate rested her head on his shoulder and sighed quietly.

_"But you're still the best...hee hee... my Tenchi..."_

After fondling him a little more, Ryoko patted his head and floated back over to the toaster. Sure enough, the waffles had yet to be finished, so she leaned against the counter. Tenchi joined her, and seated himself on the marble top.

Soon, they were staring into each other's eyes.

For the longest time they didn't even realize it.

Both of them leaned in closer, their body temperatures rising.

Tenchi was lost in her eyes, and wanted to tell her they were as brilliant as the stars.

He might well have if the toaster hadn't gone off, jettisoning the waffles into the air.

_"Stupid ass waffles, couldn't wait a few more fuckin' seconds," _Ryoko thought. _"Damn it, they're cold too!"_

They obviously weren't finished, so she turned them around and put them back in for another few minutes. The toaster was perhaps the only appliance Ryoko could work with any kind of success. Even then she tended to burn whatever was placed inside.

"How come you're making breakfast today?" Tenchi asked.

"Umm…I'm hungry," she replied simply. "I found these in the freezer."

Without having to probe her thoughts Tenchi knew she was lying. He narrowed his eyes and she immediately confessed.

"You were late coming home…so we decided to have a drinking contest during the marathon," Ryoko said. "Each one of us, minus Sasami and Washu, had a type of product, let's say…fast food. Whenever there was a commercial for that, the person who had that type of product had to take a shot of sake."

That was typical. Ryoko was the living, breathing Queen of All Drinking Contests, and had surely gotten the best of Ayeka.

_"Heh, I could've drank that sorry little priss under the table…"_

"I won too," Ryoko said, gloating. "I won fifty American dollars off Ayeka and Mihoshi."

Tenchi rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"Little Sasami fell asleep two hours into the marathon, but I was up all night. You came in sometime around twelve, right?" she inquired.

Tenchi just nodded, then began to count on his fingers down from ten. When he got to one, the waffles were finally done.

Ryoko got out a plate, then a fork, then some napkins. Placing the golden brown waffles on the plate, she prepared to devour them in a single bite.

Then she noticed Tenchi staring at them, drooling like a maniac.

"Oh, did you want one?" she said playfully.

Tenchi simply continued to drool, the spittle running down his cheek.

"If you want one, you have to come and get it," Ryoko taunted.

When he reached for the plate, she pulled it away. The more he struggled to get them the farther away Ryoko took them. She phased through the kitchen counter and stood on the other side, holding up her prize. The aroma of the waffles, combined with an empty stomach, was too much for Tenchi to bear.

He wanted those waffles and he was going to get them.

"Please let me have one," Tenchi moaned, all the while slyly positioning himself to vault over the counter.

_"He's cute when he's hungry,"_ thought the cyan haired girl.

"All you need to do is come and get me and you'll have your precious waffle," Ryoko said in her most charming tone.

"Come on, let me have one now, I'm starving!"

"_No!_ Come and get your breakfast from your Queen!"

He was about to give up and make his own food when he heard Ryoko's voice echo in his mind once more.

_"Why won't he ever play along? I don't ask for much. Please jump at me Tenchi!"_

After hearing that, a swirl of emotions twisted around inside of him like a vortex. Tenchi had always known in his heart how much he loved Ryoko, but never took the time reveal his feelings. In the back of his mind, he had planned what he would say and how it would be said. Unfortunately, Tenchi kept putting it off and putting it off, and soon he didn't want to deal with her advances, because it meant he would have to bear his soul to her.

That was something that just the day before would have been impossible for him to do.

Now the air felt charged with possibilities, and Tenchi took a chance and tried to tempt fate.

With surprising agility, Tenchi jumped clear over the counter towards Ryoko. For him, it seemed to happen in slow motion, the world going by at a snail's pace. As he flew through the air, Tenchi could see the startled look on her face, just the reaction he had been hoping for.

The prince reached for the plate of waffles in her left hand and came within inches of grabbing it, but he honestly didn't have a chance.

Ryoko disappeared in an instant, leaving only air between Tenchi and the hardwood floor.

He collided with that floor less that two seconds later, and rather hard at that.

Soon, he was flat on his back gazing up at the ceiling, a light fixture shining bright fluorescent rays down at him. The defeat was total when he glimpsed the triumphant figure of Ryoko standing over him.

The woman bent down beside him, opened his mouth, and placed a lukewarm waffle inside.

"You should have been faster," she whispered, "but I forgive you."

Tenchi frowned at her as he chewed his waffle in submission.

_"He's even cuter when he's at my mercy," _Ryoko thought, pouring some maple syrup on her breakfast.

There was nothing left for poor Tenchi to do but grin and bear it.

Even worse for him, the center of that waffle was still frozen solid.

**  
End Chapter Two**

**_Proceed to Chapter Three!_**

****

_  
-__Can't you see that I am a pioneer, u__nlocking the greatest mysteries?_

_My key is a fearless heart so pure and strong._

_People laugh when you are a pioneer, n__ot walking the straight and narrow._

_They tell you the way things are, they swear you're wrong.-_**__**


	3. No need for confrontations!

**_Chapter Three: No need for confrontations_****_!_**

**  
Outside: after the waffle incident**

After being punished by Ryoko, Tenchi Masaki stumbled out the front door and into the yard. Even as he walked out into the morning sun, the sickening taste of frozen waffle was still fresh in his mind and mouth.

Making breakfast had been a nice gesture, unfortunately Ryoko could easily set fire to cold cereal.

His father's car was still in the driveway, so he concluded that he must still be at home, however, that was totally unimportant.

Before him now was a sight Tenchi had never ever expected to see; Ayeka, the First Princess of Jurai, doing manual labor.

The fact that she was wearing a straw hat was inconsequential, as the mere concept of her working was enough to boggle the mind. Tenchi quietly approached her, not wanting to interrupt her picking up of the carrots. He found it very funny, since Ryo-Ohki was scurrying around, darting under Ayeka's legs in attempts to eat the ones she couldn't get to.

Ryoko's cabbit/intergalactic spaceship had eaten a substantial number before she noticed the young prince.

"Meow! Meowmeow eow meow!" said Ryo-Ohki, nuzzling up against Tenchi's leg.

_"Yay! Tenchi's here, and he'll feed me!" _she thought.__

He found it very odd that her thoughts were audible as well. Apparently, Tenchi could read the mind of anything female, something he wasn't sure he wanted. Ryo-Ohki ran around his left leg a few more times before she realized he had nothing to eat.

_"I'm hungry! Maybe Sasami has some food. Ayeka's so stingy about stuff like that..."_

The little brown animal scurried off in search of something tasty, leaving Tenchi alone with Princess Ayeka.

"Greetings Lord Tenchi," she said. "Could you please be of assistance?"

He intensely hated being called by a title, but did not wish to be rude. In fact, Tenchi was trying his best not to laugh at Ayeka, who was wearing an enormous straw hat. Although the Princess's flowing purple kimono showed off her attractive form, her giant farmer's hat made her look quite the fool.

"Um…sure thing Ayeka-chan," he said nervously.

The young man walked over to her and offered to pick up the rest of the carrots. He noticed the reason for her hat when he saw the large bags under her eyes. She was paying the price for getting so drunk the night before, so wearing the hat was preferable to being embarrassed.

_"He seems fine," _thought Ayeka._ "Washu-chan said he looked like he'd been in an oven. Maybe she did one of her experiments on him. No matter, Tenchi has Juraian blood. That should give him lots of…stamina."_

After picking that up, Tenchi turned beet red. The only thing he could do was to retrieve the last of the orange carrots lying on the ground.

If Ayeka was anything she was persistent, just as much as Ryoko, if not more. Her dark purple hair, alluring crimson eyes, and sweet, melodious tone had enticed many a young man. She had received thousands of proposals for marriage, and had respectfully turned down each one.

Princess Ayeka was waiting for someone else to ask for her hand.

Demure, prim, and proper, Ayeka was the perfect model of a Juraian Crown Princess. Her attraction to Tenchi stemmed from her admiration of his quiet inner strength, and his eligibility as a bachelor prince of Jurai. Ayeka was once engaged to her half brother, Yosho, Tenchi's grandfather. This ironically made her Tenchi's great aunt. Family matters and possible inbreeding aside, she nevertheless planned to marry Tenchi and live with him in royal splendor on the planet Jurai.

The was only one true obstacle to her accomplishing that.

"Did you hear what the demonic temptress did to me yesterday?" she asked Tenchi.

"Something about money, right?" he answered, knowing full well what the truth was.

_"Crazy demon-bitch fleeced me out of my money. She should not have won! I'm so much better than she is!"_

"Ryoko cheated me out of fifty dollars," Ayeka said. "She never plays fair!"

Tenchi just stared at her. To him it was obvious she was lying, that Ayeka just wanted to start a fight with Ryoko. Ayeka often found the mere idea of the Prince of Jurai with the space pirate repugnant, and never hesitated to try and drive a wedge between them. She may have been right about Ryoko being crazy, but she wasn't a demon.

Not any more at least. Those days had long past.

"How _exactly_ did she win? What were you betting on?" Tenchi inquired, already knowing the answer.

Ayeka lost the color in her face and could do nothing but gape at him.

_"Shit! I can't tell him about the drinking contest. What would he think of me?!"_ Ayeka thought frantically.

"Uhhh…um, we were playing a game," she lied, "and Ryoko was cheating I just know it! She always does that!"

Tenchi just picked up the last carrot from the ground and put it in the now dirt covered wicker basket.

Ayeka simply wanted the best for Tenchi, and would never let him get hurt by anyone. She loved him that much, making it the only real reason she disliked Ryoko so vehemently. Ever since Kagato had taken control of the lovely pirate, using her powers to destroy much of Jurai, there had been much animosity between them.

It only multiplied when Tenchi came into their lives.

Seven hundred years of hatred between princess and pirate came to the boiling point nearly every day.

It was about to happen again as the being that was Ryoko walked out the front door and into the driveway.

"Hi Tenchi! I'm back!" she said cheerfully.

With a plate of steaming hot pancakes in her right hand, she floated gracefully over to Tenchi. Ryoko wrapped her left arm around him gave him a big hug.

"Look, Tenchi-san, look! I made _pancakes!_ I didn't burn them this time either!" she bubbled.

Her previous attempts to cook had been disastrous. Sasami was a much better chef than anyone in the household, but every once in a while one of the other girls would have a go at making dinner or something, which usually required the use of a fire extinguisher afterwards.

_"Finally, I can work that fucking stove without starting a fire. All I had to do was follow the directions on the side of the box. Who'da thunk it was so easy...heh ...Tenchi had better like these, 'cause there aren't any more of 'em." _Ryoko thought. _"Uh-oh, wait a minute, what's Ayeka still doing here?"_

"Morning Miss Ayeka, want a pancake?" asked the space pirate.

Ryoko had to stifle the urge to laugh at the Princess for the largeness of the hat on her head. In the back of her mind, she was also wondering what the Lady could be hiding underneath.

_"Ugh, disgusting," _Ayeka thought. _"I'll bet she's trying to poison me!"_

"No thank you," the Princess curtly replied, crossing her arms in disgust.

Soon after, Ayeka became enraged as Tenchi sampled some the pirate's home cooking. He put a piece in his mouth, chewed it, and swallowed without any problems. To the Princess's further dismay, a broad smile crept slowly across his lips, and she was immediately filled with jealousy.

"These are pretty good Ryoko-chan," he said. "Do you mind if I have some more? I still feel like I haven't eaten in days."

When she happily nodded, Tenchi Masaki proceeded to quickly devour the remaining crispy, golden brown pancakes. As he was occupied, Ryoko and Ayeka were left alone together, a catastrophe waiting to happen with the object of their affections standing only a few feet away.

"Do you plan on giving me my money back?" asked the Princess.

"And why would I do that Miss Ayeka?" Ryoko smugly replied.

"_Don't_ play dumb! You _cheated!_"

"I did not! _How dare you!_"

"Yes you _did! Stop lying!_"

"Did _not!_"

"Did _too!_"

"Did _not!_"

"Did _too!_"

This went back and forth several more times. As far as Tenchi could tell, the two of them were being equally sincere in their exclamations, and this was sure to degenerate into childish name-calling. It got to the point where the tension between the two bordered on homicidal, as it did during all previous such encounters. Feeling emboldened, Ryoko walked straight up to the Princess and flicked the brim of her hat upwards.

The act sent the straw headgear flying over the back of Ayeka's head, exposing her face to the intense rays of the sun. Stumbling backwards, the Juraian princess attempted to shield her weary eyes from the blazing light, playing right into Ryoko's hands.

"Awww, does somebody have a hangover?" said the pirate in a half cutesy, half demeaning tone. "Shame that you can't hold down your alcohol as well as I."

His mouth full, Tenchi could do nothing but stand there and watch, flabbergasted.

"What did you do, _huh?!_" Ayeka demanded to know. "Was it grape juice? Iced tea? _Ginger ale?!_"

Ryoko turned bright red, and took a step backwards in shock.

_"How the fuck did she know about the ginger ale?!" _she thought.

Tenchi picked that up, and knew the Princess would capitalize on the moment of her hesitation.

"_Aha!_ I knew it, you _demon-whore!"_ she yelled. "I've _always_ known there was _never_ a shred of decency in you!"

Fuming mad, all Ryoko could do was blink. She was absolutely paralyzed with rage, but somehow found the right words to shoot back.

"So what if I did cheat?! It's not my fault you're so goddamn _gullible!_" Ryoko yelled. "I was drinking hard liquor a thousand years before you were born!"

"Then why the hell did you have to cheat!" Ayeka countered.

"Because it's fun and easy. What are you, simple? I'll bet you stole that money I bilked you out of!"

"I hate you! She's a dirty whore, Tenchi. Never listen to her!"

"Stupid _bitch!_ I swear Ayeka, I'll _kill_ you if you embarrass me in front of him!"

"You won't need _me_ to do that!"

Things were quickly getting out of hand. So far, every word the two of them had flung at each other had sincerity behind it. In the next few seconds, possibly more, they two of them would use their powers and then they'd be having another one of their epic battles.

And of course, their battles usually ended up destroying the surrounding landscape.

Swallowing the last pancake, Tenchi decided to speak up.

"Uhhh…girls, I think you should calm down," he said quickly. "Think…think of the trees."

Instantly, the both of them grew wide-eyed, as if they couldn't believe he had interrupted their argument.

_"Yikes, he's right,"_ thought Ryoko. _"I don't want to make him angry, or give in to Psycho Princess over there."_

_"I should stop," _thought Ayeka. _"We shouldn't fight when Lord Tenchi is present. I'll get that bitch back later."_

For a moment, there was an awkward silence between them, but only for a moment. Very quickly, Ryoko took advantage of the situation so she could grope Tenchi some more. Tousling her hair in an arousing way, she phased behind the young man and began to rub his shoulders.

"Well, I'm at least glad you enjoyed the pancakes, my love," she said.

"Sure…uh…sure thing," Tenchi replied.

Noticing that Princess Ayeka was once again turning green with envy, Ryoko decided to take this to the next level. Wrapping both arms around him and rubbing his chest, she placed her head on his shoulder and whispered into his ear.

"You know, I put a whole bunch of aphrodisiacs in the pancake batter," she said, just loud enough for Ayeka to hear. "I was hoping we could make love later tonight, but it seems Her Lordshipfulness wants to spoil our fun…"

Tenchi could hear no other thought from her to contradict that statement.

Right then and there, his nose began to gush blood.

He yelled loudly, and dropped the empty plate. It broke when it hit the pavement, shattering into a hundred pieces, drops of red blood splattering amongst the fragments.

"Oh _crap!_" Tenchi exclaimed. "I _really_ have to go! Excuse me…"

Removing the space pirate from his body, he took off running in the other direction, trying desperately to stop the bleeding.

As he bolted towards the Masaki family shrine, he could hear the last of Ryoko's thoughts.

_"Damn, I scared him off again. I have to learn to stop that, and he needs to learn how to take a joke. What the...?! Stupid Ayeka lookin' at me now like a ugly b…"_

Even though she was only jesting, Ryoko would have had sex with him in a heartbeat.

So would Ayeka.

Poor Tenchi, he misses out on everything…

**  
End Chapter Three**

****

**_Proceed to Chapter Four!_**

****

****

_  
-__You can't be a hero hiding underneath your bed. __Got to live the life you create inside your head._

_So I opened the window, caught the wind one night._

_Now I sail with the birds in their flight.-_**__**


	4. No need for pep talks!

**_Chapter Four: No need for pep talks!_**   
  
**  
Steps of the Masaki Family Shrine**   
  
Tenchi bolted up the stairs as fast as he possibly could. His nose had stopped bleeding, but that was of little consequence to him now.   
  
He had to get away, as far as was humanly possible.   
  
The young prince ran and ran until he simply could no longer move his legs. His limbs turned to putty, and Tenchi collapsed on the stones.   
  
_"Why me?"_ he thought to himself. _"I'm a good person, I pay my taxes, and I do hard, honest work. So why does all the crazy crap have to happen to me?!"_   
  
Angry with himself and the world in general, Tenchi stared up at the bright morning sky. He had finally gotten used to everything about the girls, all their pros and all their cons. Everything was routine now, with the upkeep of the house and shrine running like clockwork twenty-four seven.   
  
Each of the girls had made a deep impression on him. In his first year of college, Tenchi was almost nineteen years old. He was no longer as timid as he had once been, and felt he had truly come of age.   
  
However, Ayeka and Ryoko still fought constantly, often coming to blows over him. Washu was becoming more and more reclusive, interested only in her experiments. Mihoshi didn't seem to be able to function without some mission from the Galaxy Police, and rarely said anything anymore. Sasami increased her workload, and had become little more than a short order cook.   
  
Tenchi's routine had caused all this, though he had yet to realize it.   
  
Before he could do any more wondering, somebody started screaming.   
  
"_YAAAY!_" the unmistakable voice of Mihoshi Kuramitsu screamed.   
  
Looking down, Tenchi saw the young Galaxy Police officer running toward him at a frantic pace.   
  
She came to a screeching halt when she saw the Juraian Prince.   
  
"Master Tenchi! I have _wonderful_ news!!" Mihoshi squealed in delight.   
  
Unexpectedly, she dove at him and gave him one of the biggest hugs he'd ever gotten in his life. She squeezed and squeezed until Tenchi was gasping for air. Only when he made a half-hearted attempt to inhale did the excited Mihoshi let go.   
  
"That's…great Mihoshi. What happened that's so wonderful," asked the Juraian prince.   
  
The young lady just stared at him with a very smug grin on her face. Instead of her normal, very casual attire, Mihoshi was wearing her Galaxy Police uniform. It was pristinely ironed, without a single crease or stain to dull the blue fabric.   
  
_"Hee hee, Tenchi'll never guess,"_ she thought. _"I was never supposed to get an assignment ever again. This is so perfect…"_   
  
"Lemme guess, you…got a some kind of a new mission or something to that effect?" asked Tenchi, already knowing the answer.   
  
Mihoshi was absolutely dumbfounded, yet still quite agitated.   
  
"_Wow!_ It's like you read my mind!" she exclaimed. "You're so talented Master Tenchi!"   
  
For the next few seconds after that statement, Tenchi and Mihoshi awkwardly stared at each other. No expressions were made, no sounds except for the quaint rustling of the wind through the tree, only two living beings together in a beautiful setting. The young prince had always been too busy to notice how very beautiful Mihoshi was. Her dazzling blue eyes and shimmering golden hair were wonderfully enticing, yet he had never complemented her on them. Tenchi had been a fool for not noticing her in the past, as he had often times brushed her aside in favor of Ayeka, Ryoko, or Washu.   
  
Now, as they stood together on the steps of his family shrine, he regretted doing such a thing, and suddenly wished they had been closer as friends.   
  
All Tenchi could do was promise himself that he would remedy that in the future.   
  
"When are you leaving?" he asked.   
  
"As soon as Washu gets my passport back from the Galaxy Police," she replied. "So…probably in a few hours. I just came here to tell you that."   
  
Tenchi wanted to continue on about how he loved her personality, the way she styled her hair, and how she never really in a bad mood. Instead, he merely smiled uncomfortably, only occasionally glimpsing up at her.   
  
"Oh…everything will be so dull while you're gone…" was all he managed to get out.   
  
The look in his eyes revealed the true meaning behind his simple words. Mihoshi felt flush all of a sudden, and her face turned bright red.   
  
_"My goodness, does he feel for me? It can't be true. But what if it is? Damn it, why did I play dumb all this time! I should've made my move when I had the chance…"_   
  
Needing to leave to find Washu, she gave Tenchi a quick hug and turned away.   
  
"Good bye, I'll see you soon," said the young lady, turning away.   
  
As she walked slowly down the stairs, Tenchi could hear her innermost thoughts.   
  
They were much deeper than he had ever expected them to be.

**

* * *

**

****

**The Masaki Family Shrine**   
  
After talking with Mihoshi, Tenchi felt rather down. He would be losing a good friend. In his heart knew Mihoshi wasn't a stupid person, just clumsy at times.   
  
Sadly climbing the steps, he reached the Masaki family shrine. Beautiful in its traditional Japanese construction, it exuded a feeling of peace and security. The quaint forest surrounded the shrine, which sat atop a rather steep hill, giving it the need for an entire network of stairways. Nevertheless, the sparrows chirping in the morning sunlight made Tenchi feel ever so serene.   
  
He felt that way at least until he saw his grandfather standing at the shrine's entrance looking rather peeved.   
  
Katsuhito, Tenchi's grandfather and one-time prince of Jurai, came to Earth a long time ago and renounced his claim to the Jurai throne. However, when Tenchi was born, he saw the boy's potential and began training him in the Juraian ways. He had long since taken care of the Masaki family shrine and despite his age was still a powerful fighter and a wise leader.   
  
The second Tenchi finally trudged up to the entrance, his grandfather immediately handed him a broom.   
  
"You're late again," said Katsuhito sternly. "Sweep."   
  
"But sensei, I have to tell y…" Tenchi started to say before being silenced.   
  
"Sweep."   
  
"But sensei!"   
  
"You sweep now."   
  
Not willing to disobey his grandfather, and not picking up any of his thought processes, Tenchi sighed heavily and diligently went to work.   
  
For the next hour and a half he swept the inside and the outside of the shrine. With a brush and a bucket of paint, Tenchi finally covered up an unfinished spot that he'd left as bare wood for three years. With a rake, he carefully smoothed out the fine gravel that lined the outer edges of the shrine until it was perfectly flat.   
  
After completing all of this, he went inside to find Katsuhito. Taking off his shoes, he stepped into the shrine. His grandfather was sitting crosslegged on the floor surrounded by burning incense. Deep in meditation, Tenchi dared not disturb him in any way shape or form. He bowed before his sensei for the next few minutes until Katsuhito decided he was finished attaining enlightenment.   
"Have a seat Tenchi," he said, "and tell me what's on your mind."   
  
The young prince grimaced as he sat down across from his grandfather. What he had to relate was going to be very difficult to explain.   
  
"Are you ready for this sensei?" Tenchi inquired. "It might seem a little outlandish."   
  
Katsuhito quietly sighed, and extinguish the incense candles around him.   
  
"Oh, please. Living with you and the girls is often the epitome of outlandish," he replied. "So by all means, go ahead."   
  
The younger Juraian took a deep breath and collected his thoughts before speaking.   
  
"I…I…I'm pretty sure I can hear what women are thinking," was all that Tenchi said.   
  
Ever so slowly, Katsuhito's jaw began to drop wide open. He couldn't quite believe that, and needed to hear it again for confirmation.   
  
"Repeat what you said," Tenchi grandfather demanded.   
  
"I can hear what women think," the confused young man answered.   
  
"You can hear what they think?!"   
  
"I think so…"   
  
"How could this have happened?"   
  
"I think I got hit by lightning. Do you think this has anything to do with any of Washu's weather experiments, sensei?"   
  
"I think you should be quiet for a moment so I can think."   
  
Tenchi promptly shut his mouth while his grandfather pondered the weight of the circumstances. Katsuhito stood up and paced back and forth a few times, trying to rearrange a vague series of events in his mind. He'd been quite angry that Tenchi had not been around the past few days to tend the shrine. The young prince had been harvesting the fields for quite some time and had neglected many of his household duties.   
  
He had been doing that just so he could have some extra time to himself, away from the girls.   
  
The young Juraian had finally gotten to the point where he could call himself sane again.   
  
Then Washu decided to play goddess again and screwed around with the weather, causing him to be struck by lightning.   
  
Poor Tenchi's life was nothing but pain.   
  
However, Katsuhito, being the wise man that he was, found the overriding factor that set everything straight. He walked over to his grandson, who was curled up in the fetal position, trying to shut out the simple thoughts of a few female birds in a tree outside. Bending down, Katsuhito picked Tenchi up and stood him on his feet.   
  
"Tenchi, you need to get a hold of yourself!" he said, shaking his grandson by the shoulders.   
  
"But grandfather…what's the point?" Tenchi replied, his voice unsure. "The day hasn't even ended and I'm losing my mind already!"   
  
Katsuhito shook the young man harder this time. Tenchi just refused to see the good present in the situation.   
  
"Boy, you really don't understand do you? You are quite possibly the _luckiest_ man ever to live in the history of the universe!"   
  
Quite startled by that, Tenchi's eyes grew extra wide, and he broke free of his grandfather's hold.

"Are you kidding me?" he asked.   
  
"Not at all," Katsuhito replied. "Men all over the galaxy have been trying to figure out what women could possibly want since the beginning of time! Now you can do it with no trouble at all. Can't you see how _incredibly fortunate_ you are?!"   
  
For a good long minute Tenchi had to think about that. His brain was fried already from the barrage of thoughts the girls had given him earlier. With his quick reflection, he finally realized that this new power of his was not a burden, but a tool. With it, he might very well be able to put behind years and years of domestic disturbances and make peace with the girls.   
  
He also might finally be able to tell the girl he truly loved how he felt inside.   
  
"I can't believe it, you're right!" Tenchi exclaimed. "Sensei, you're a _genius!_"   
  
Giving his grandfather a rather informal hug, Tenchi bolted out the door with a new found sense of enthusiasm. Katsuhito watched as his grandson ran off, quietly sighing to himself.   
  
Then he remembered something very important.   
  
_"Nobuyuki! Oh crap! If he exploits this the girls'll kill him and Tenchi! Why did my son-in-law have to turn out to be such a bloody pervert?!"_   
  
With the same speed Tenchi had just demonstrated, Katsuhito flew out the door and down the stairs. He absolutely had to stop Nobuyuki from talking to Tenchi, otherwise he'd learn of the young prince's new powers and would surely find a way to use them for his own gain.   
  
Katsuhito was now a man on a mission.   
  
His objective: to prevent the beans from being spilled.

**  
End Chapter Four**

****

****

**_Proceed to Chapter Five!_****__**

****

****

_  
-If you're tired of everything come hitch a ride with me._

_You'll cry out with joy when you realize you're free._

_It's a trip like no other for your heart and mind l__eaving all but the future far behind.-_**__**

****


	5. No need for a fist fight!

**_Chapter Five: No need for a fist fight!_**   
  
**Masaki Household: a few hours later**   
  
"C'mon everybody! _Lunch is ready!"_ yelled Sasami as loud as she possibly could.   
  
At one-forty five in the afternoon, this was the latest she had ever started making lunch. Sasami had gotten more sleep than she had bargained for, nearly thirteen hours worth. Even though she felt refreshed, she still found it odd that she'd been out of the loop for quite so long. By the time she'd gotten dressed, there was only enough time for her to make a couple of bowls of cereal and some toast.   
  
Neatly placing the food on the table, she got out some napkins and some spoons and put them next to each bowl.   
  
She finished doing this just in time to see her sister, Ayeka, dutifully report for lunch. Tenchi, who had a beleaguered look on his face, followed her less than a minute later. Next came Ryoko, who wore an ear-to-ear smile that showed everyone that she'd just finished filling the young prince's head with dirty thoughts. Ryo-Ohki had been sitting on the counter the whole time, quietly eating a small plate of carrots.   
  
Noticeably absent were Washu and Mihoshi, who were still downstairs in the laboratory where they'd been for several hours.   
  
Bound to tradition, Princess Ayeka waited for Tenchi to be seated first, since he was head of the household. On the other hand, Ryoko had no such respect for things that she deemed as silly or trivial, like the royal Juraian's little tradition. The space pirate promptly sat down at her spot and motioned for Tenchi to come and sit beside her.   
  
_"Heh heh…this oughta get Miss Pretty Princess Puff all hot and bothered,"_ Ryoko thought.   
  
"Come and sit next to me, my Tenchi," she said in a sultry voice. "Don't be shy now."   
  
Picking up her thoughts, the young Juraian instantly became nervous, and put his hand behind his head.   
  
"I don't know if that's such a good idea, Ryoko," he replied, already knowing it wouldn't do any good.   
  
Sure enough, it wasn't, and the lovely pirate firmly grabbed his other arm and pulled him down onto his seat. Ryoko put her arm around him as she gleefully watched Ayeka get jealous. Before the Princess could say anything insulting, the pirate looked down at what she thought was a hot meal. Instead she was greeted with a bowl of cereal and a piece of rapidly cooling toast.   
  
"Hey! Sasami, what the heck is this?" she exclaimed. "Where's lunch? We've all had breakfast already!"   
  
"This is lunch Ryoko, I'm sorry," the little princess apologized. "I woke up real, real late and there wasn't enough time to make a big meal."   
  
_"We don't live in a restaurant,"_ Sasami thought afterwards. _"I feel so unappreciated sometimes! Oh well, grin and bear it they say..."_   
  
Tenchi just watched as Ayeka and Ryoko let out a collective sigh. They quietly proceeded to eat their lunch as Sasami sat down at her spot next to her sister. Without saying anything, she picked up her spoon and began to eat her Cheerios, all the while staring at Tenchi expectantly.   
  
_"It's not bad, not bad at all,"_ Ryoko was thinking, _"I suppose we could have had nothing...which would have sucked..."_   
  
The pirate shoveled a spoonful of cereal into her mouth, followed a second later by some toast, her mind then going off on a tangent. After reading her thoughts and finding they were mainly of him, Tenchi drank a bit of orange juice before focusing on Princess Ayeka.   
  
_"Breakfast food for lunch…hmm, I'm reminded of that time when we were in town,"_ she thought. _"What was the name of that place we ate at? I dare say, it's on the tip of my tongue..."_   
  
A look of consternation appeared on her face as she delved into her memory, searching in vain for the missing word. Finally taking advantage of his grandfather's advice, Tenchi put his new talent to practical use.   
  
"Hey, little Sasami, this is just like that time we went to the International House of Pancakes," he said, immediately drawing the attention of the two sisters. "You know, breakfast food for lunch and everything like that."   
  
"You're right," the younger princess said, smiling broadly, "it is like the pancake house!"   
  
"Lord Tenchi, you took the words right out of my mouth," Ayeka said incredulously. "I was just thinking along those lines. It's almost like you finished my sentence. You're so very talented Tenchi."   
  
The Juraian prince felt satisfied at how that played out. Sasami was quite happy to get a compliment and Ayeka was impressed that he seemed to know her well enough to finish her thoughts. He had gotten exactly the reaction he had planned from the girls, and was beginning to get a grip on his new power. Of course, Ryoko didn't think much of it at all, as always, and worked to trump Ayeka by pawing at the object of her affections.   
  
"Honestly, how can Cheerios compare to those pancakes I made you earlier Tenchi?' she said, lazily drawing circles on his chest. "If we were going to have stuff like this for lunch, don't you think it should have been a little better?"   
  
Tenchi tried to brush her off and get her to finish her food, but she kept incessantly clawing at him, so the prince would have to remove the pirate by other means.   
  
"Ryoko…stop it! Be grateful for once in your life," he said in a harsh tone. "This meal isn't bad at all. We should be grateful to Sasami for at least making an effort. None of us appreciate her enough. We'd all just…go hungry if she wasn't around."   
  
The space pirate stopped groping him, seemingly hurt by his words, but still kept her arms around Tenchi for good measure.   
_"Just wonderful how he likes the cook so much more than me,"_ thought Ryoko, the sarcasm obvious. _"I'm beginning to wonder why I bother anymore. Ugh, all for nothing..."_   
  
For the next few moments, she just stared at her lunch, what was left of it anyway. Tenchi began to carefully listen to her thoughts, all the while nonchalantly eating his cereal. He was shocked to learn that Ryoko was growing increasingly frustrated with the current situation in the Masaki household. Her constant fights with Ayeka were getting worse, and the fact that the man she loved the most always seemed to have a callous attitude towards her.   
  
_"All the flirting gets me nowhere, and those romance novels are full of bullshit,"_ thought the lovely pirate. "_I must be delusional if I think he's in love with me..."_   
  
Appalled at what he had heard, Tenchi immediately sought to put her fears and doubts to rest.   
  
"Ryoko, ah…I don't want you t…" he started before being interrupted by Jurai's Crown Princess.   
  
"He doesn't want you holding on to him like a _tramp_ all the time!" Ayeka exclaimed, her face red with anger. "Get your hands _off of Lord Tenchi!_"   
  
Tenchi honestly hadn't realized it that much, but Ryoko had left her arms draped around him the entire time. He'd gotten so used to it that the sensation didn't irk him to high heavens anymore. Too busy listening in on Ryoko's inner musings, he'd neglected to pay attention to Ayeka, who had been steadily growing more and more jealous. At first, the Princess didn't say anything, but when her personal nemesis refused to let go of the man she wanted to marry, Ayeka was compelled to take action.   
  
The fact that Tenchi hadn't made any efforts to get rid of the space pirate only infuriated her that much more.   
  
_"I'll be damned before I let that monster woman steal him from me...just like...Yosho..."_ thought Ayeka. _"She stole him from me!"_   
  
She had always personally blamed Ryoko for her brother's disappearance. On Jurai, it was not perceived as wrong, or indecent, or illegal to marry a family member. Ayeka had been betrothed to Yosho, and loved him with all of her heart and soul. When he left Jurai to battle Ryoko seven hundred years before, and then did not return afterwards, her very essence was torn asunder and dashed to pieces. She now held the pirate responsible for taking away her brother and any chance at real happiness.   
  
"I can't believe you're doing this here, at the _table?!_ Have you no manners at all, _monster?!_" she said in a shrill voice. "I _won't _let you steal him from me!"   
  
Ryoko merely rolled her eyes at the enraged Princess. She honestly enjoyed their little conflicts every now and then, and never missed the chance to egg the royal Juraian on. She and Ayeka stood up at the very same time, almost as if on cue. Little Sasami tried to say something to stop the ensuing battle out of concern for Tenchi's well being, but her sister quieted her before she could even open her mouth.   
  
_"This is gonna be bad, I know it. Try to stop them Tenchi!"_ little Sasami thought.   
  
Jerking Tenchi to his feet, the lovely pirate continued to display her affection for him by fondling his private areas, pushing Ayeka to the limits of self-control.   
  
"Steal him?!" Ryoko said, trying to sound innocent. "What are you trying to say? You think you own him or something?"   
  
"I said nothing of the sort!" Ayeka replied angrily. "Don't put words in my mouth!"   
  
"Good then, because you know perfectly well that Tenchi belongs to me."   
  
"Lord Tenchi doesn't belong to anybody! And if he did, he certainly wouldn't belong to someone **as _vile _as _you!_"   
**  
Ryoko pretended to act hurt by Ayeka's last statement. She pouted her lips and stared longingly at Tenchi, who, by now, had been simply smiling nervously as he always did whenever the girls began to fight. Just from the look in her eyes, the young prince could tell she was thinking of something quite devious.   
  
_"Okay, let's kick this up a notch,"_ thought Ryoko. _"Time to tell her something about that stupid money she lost. Heh...put on your poker face, cause it's showtime!"_   
  
The beautiful soldier of fortune gave Tenchi the biggest puppy dog eyes she'd ever given in her entire life. Honey colored orbs pierced his soul, turning him once again into a jabbering, timid mess of a young man. She threw herself into his arms and embraced him tenderly.   
  
"Aww…Ryoko…c'mon…lemme go, please?!" he stammered, unable to shake free of her iron grip.   
  
"No way!" she answered. "I own you, my Tenchi. I'm begging you, tell me, when are we going to get married?"   
  
By now, Ayeka was extremely pissed off. Angry and resentful enough to leap right over the table, she covered the space between them in less than a second. There was only a foot and a half separating the girls. At that distance, the borders of safety would certainly be pushed to their limits, and more than likely, beyond.   
  
_"That's it, I can't stand this any longer!"_ little Sasami thought.   
  
Sasami had given up trying to control the two of them, and she got up from the table, tears welling up in her eyes. One of her well-made meals had been ruined again by the fighting, and she wanted nothing more to do with either of them.   
  
"If you guys want to fight over little things that's fine, but you shouldn't do it at the table!" she cried. "We're supposed to be a _family!_"   
  
Grabbing Ryo-Ohki from off the counter-top, she stormed out of the kitchen and went upstairs to be alone with her thoughts.

* * *

Unfortunately, Sasami's important point was lost on both Ryoko and Ayeka.   
  
"See what you've done now?! You've upset my sister!" yelled the Princess, her fists balled up. "And for the last time, _get your hands off him!_"   
  
"Me?! You're the one who started this!" the pirate retorted, her grip on Tenchi increasing. "I'm not gonna tell you again either. He belongs to _me!_ I paid good money for him and I'm _not_ about to let someone else have him!"   
  
Before the Juraian prince could say anything, his captor placed her hand over his mouth to prevent him from speaking.   
  
Tenchi tried hard to squirm away, but he couldn't get away from Ryoko. The thoughts he had been getting from them had grown increasingly more and more violent. He really hadn't ever grasped the full extent of the rivalry between Ayeka and Ryoko, but now he understood quite well how deep their well of emotions really was. Both girls loved him with all their hearts, but it was the simple fact that he hadn't ever shown them what was in his that drove them to such lengths.   
  
Already unpleasant to begin with, the situation was more than out of hand and would soon take a turn for the worse.   
  
"Quit _lying!_ You _do not_ own Lord Tenchi!" Ayeka shouted. "I have to protect him from _monsters_ like you!"   
  
"I'm no monster! I'm his fiancée'!" said Ryoko with a grin. "And if I have my way we'll be getting hitched sooner than you think, Princess!"   
  
"He would never agree to marry such a worthless, vile, despicable, _unattractive_ woman like _you!_" the royal Juraian retorted.   
  
Rare indeed was the occasion where Ayeka had the audacity to essentially call Ryoko ugly. The few times that she had, there had been a great battle between the two of them, the Princess being quick to point out afterwards that the pirate was also uncouth and not enough of a lady to be with Tenchi. Normally, the space brigand would have already started wailing ferociously on the Juraian and vice versa. However, this time Ryoko had every intention of playing it cool.   
  
"Well, you can say whatever the hell you want about me, but we're still getting married. Honorable father Nobuyuki gave us his blessing," said Ryoko, her voice calm and firm.   
  
The amber-eyed pirate received great satisfaction from the look that appeared on Ayeka's face. It was a face twisted all of a sudden by anguish, defeat, and embarrassment all at once. Although she didn't believe it at all, the mere prospect of her beloved being wed to another tore at her soul. Ryoko giggled to herself, finally letting go of Tenchi's face, allowing him to breath through his mouth again. Already nearly bowled over by the heated words, he was also burdened with the magnitude of their thoughts as well.   
  
_"Excellent! Ha ha! That's the look! Aww, yes! Perfect!"_ Ryoko was thinking. "_This battle is over I guess. Might as well deliver that final blow, heh heh. Then it'll be back to lunch with my Tenchi..."_   
  
Princess Ayeka's mind was much more troubled than that of her nemesis.   
  
_"It isn't true...no, it couldn't be. I've tried so hard to protect him from her and they just grow closer!"_ she thought. _"What can I do to make him see that she'd only be his downfall?! He'd forsake his destiny to stay here on this insignificant little planet! Why?!"_   
  
Finally, Ryoko decided that she'd deliver her punchline. It would be certain to push Ayeka over the edge, just what she wanted her to do, proving that the Princess was just as crude as the pirate.   
  
"Honorable father was so excited when I asked him. He said all he needed was a dowry, so I paid him that fifty bucks I won from you," said Ryoko plainly.   
  
_"How did she get American money in Japan anyway? Doesn't make sense..."_ she thought a moment later. _"I should probably give it back...nah..."_   
  
Indeed, that was the clincher. The lovely pirate began to laugh heartily upon seeing Ayeka's face contort through an enormous range of emotions. Ryoko's laughing only grated against the Princess's ears, infuriating her even more. She knew in her heart that her arch-rival was lying through her teeth, and would make her pay dearly for it.   
  
Ayeka could only take so much, and she'd gone beyond the breaking point now.   
  
She would snap if Ryoko didn't stop mocking her. Something bad would happen and people were going to get hurt.   
  
Since she couldn't hurt the pirate with her words, the Princess would do it with her fist.   
  
Too absorbed in her own sense of satisfaction, Ryoko never saw the blow coming.   
  
In the end, all that the cyan haired lady would remember was the mind numbing pain and the sickening crunch of cartilage being shattered.   
  
Bewildered by the violence of the two girls thoughts, Tenchi looked to where Ryoko had been standing just a moment before. Alas, she was no longer there, as if she had disappeared. Tenchi gazed down, and to his amazement, found her sprawled out on the floor, holding her face in agony. She was lying on her back, not saying or doing anything but breathing very hard, almost hyperventilating. Ryoko's amber colored eyes burned holes in the ceiling, staring perfectly straight forward as if she'd been struck dumb all of a sudden.   
  
A faint trickle of red blood oozed through her tightly clenched fingers, dripping down and pooling on the wood floor.   
  
Tenchi knelt beside Ryoko and was suddenly awash in all of her most violent emotions, giving him an instant headache. It was as if he could feel the physical pain as well as the emotional from her, and it took all of his strength just to continue looking at her.   
  
_"It...it hurts..."_ thought Ryoko through her misery. _"She...hit me! My...nose...is...broken! Damn...it...damn everything!"_   
  
She had always been tough on the outside, but she wasn't invincible. The truth was that Ryoko, despite her many facades, was fragile on the inside, and her spirit had just been smashed as her pretty face had been. Right now, the pirate didn't want to be seen, and turned away from Tenchi and Ayeka so they wouldn't be able to see her cry.   
  
_"What have I done?"_ Ayeka suddenly thought to herself. "_I didn't mean to! It wasn't my fault! It was a reflex! Oh, Ryoko, I'm sorry!"_   
  
The Princess took a wary step forward, knowing that things could only get worse. She already felt terrible about what had happened. It was in her very nature to be compassionate and understanding, yet she had been envious and distrustful and cruel.   
  
"Miss Ryoko…I'm sorry. I honestly didn't mean to…" was all Ayeka got to say before being cut off.   
  
"_Shut up!_" Ryoko yelled, still clutching her broken nose. "Just _shut up!_ I _don't_ wanna hear it!"   
  
Her voice was shrill and nasal, and the girl seemed on the verge of breaking down right then and there. Reaching into one of the pockets of her kimono, Ryoko pulled out a wad of paper money. Fuming mad beyond all sense of the word, she threw the balled up currency at Ayeka. It sailed through the air and landed at her feet, fully half of it stained red with blood.   
  
Although it lay there unassumingly, it had become a symbol of all the malice that the two of them had for each other   
  
"There! Keep your precious money, you _horrible bitch!_" screamed Ryoko, who had finally mustered the energy to sit up. "No more! I can't stand this anymore! _I don't want to live like this at all!_"   
  
For a moment, she stared at Tenchi, her eyes filled with tears. Gazing at the man she loved, Ryoko seemed to soften and the pain went away, but only for that brief second in time. Hardness appeared in her eyes once more, and she turned away from him and tried to get to her feet.   
  
Ryoko stumbled a bit, unsure of her legs after being on the receiving end of such a powerful blow. Tenchi rushed in to help her, but for the first time ever, she pushed him away, practically shoving him to the ground. Turning her back on him and Ayeka she began to walk away.   
  
"_Don't_ follow me Tenchi! Stay with your princess!" said Ryoko in a harsh tone. "Since she loves you so much, she can have you! _I'm out of here!_"   
  
As soon as she said this, the brigand stopped in her tracks, as if she had caught herself in a deadly trap. Tenchi's jaw had already dropped wide open, and he gawked at her, his brain refusing to believe what his ears had just told him.   
  
She stood there quietly, her mind crying out to him, _"Good-bye, my Tenchi. Don't forget me..."_   
  
With that last thought, Ryoko sobbed bitterly one last time, then phased into nonexistence, leaving her love behind.

* * *

**Minutes later**   
  
Still stunned, and now shaking, Tenchi Masaki felt weak in the knees. In the end, this was all his fault, and he knew it all too well. But he was frozen in place it seemed, his essence torn asunder and dashed upon the rocks by Ryoko's sharp words. Tenchi desperately needed to find the lovely pirate, but if she did not want to be found, then chances were she never would be.   
  
It would take another to jolt him back into action.   
  
He had forgotten all about her, but undoubtedly Ayeka was still there, just as traumatized as he was. Nevertheless, she gathered her courage and placed a soothing hand on his shoulder. She didn't feel good or justified in hitting Ryoko, and had to make amends somehow, lest the weight of her conscience crush her.   
  
"Princess?!" said Tenchi, startled back into coherence by her touch. "What...what should I do?"   
  
_"Go after her, silly! Boy, he really is dense sometimes!"_ Ayeka thought. _"Like lead almost. Stay in school, Tenchi-sama."_   
  
The pretty royal Juraian sighed heavily and looked deeply into his hazelnut eyes.   
  
"You know what you have to do..." she tenderly replied. "Now hop to it!"   
  
Grabbing him firmly, Ayeka began to shove him out the door. When they got to the glass pane, she opened it and pushed him outside, then quickly shut it behind him. Tenchi had always known what it was he needed to do, but he merely needed a kick in the pants to get himself moving. Princess Ayeka had given him that, and he immediately set off to search for Ryoko, hoping that when he found her it wouldn't be too late.   
  
As he ran off into the open air, Tenchi picked up the last of Ayeka's thoughts.   
  
_"Please, Tenchi...tell her I'm sorry. Tell her I didn't mean it, the way I couldn't. Please, help her!"_   
  
Then and there he silently vowed to do just that.   
  
Tenchi would find Ryoko.   
  
He would tell her exactly how he felt.   
  
It was only a matter of time…

**  
End Chapter Five**

**_Proceed to Chapter Six!_**

****

****

_  
-Some will say you're safer here._

_Never mind them, be a pioneer!-_


	6. No need for vodka!

**_Chapter Six: No need for vodka!_**   
  
**The wooded area around the Masaki property: two days later**   
  
To Nobuyuki Masaki, it had seemed like a million years since he'd been tied up by his father-in-law and left to rot in the shrine office. So much time had passed by that he greatly feared Katsuhito had forgotten about him. Nobuyuki had missed the whole weekend now and most of Monday. Almost three days of his one-week vacation had been wasted now, and he was eager to make up the time lost.   
  
For quite a while, Nobuyuki had been slowly squirming his way out of the ropes that bound him. He'd finally escaped not too long ago, and leaving the shrine, he disappeared into the dense foliage of the woods.   
  
By now it was Monday evening, and the sun was setting far in the west. It had vanished behind the mountains, but from there it still gave off that last bit of daylight. The summer sky was tinted a brilliant shade of orange, like a giant, never-ending, all-expansive carrot.   
  
Deftly sneaking through the thick underbrush, Nobuyuki made his way down the mountain. After another five minutes of journeying, he at last came within sight of the Masaki residence. At the edge of the forest, he could see the modest little house, next to the lake, where it had been deposited a few years before by Ryo-Ohki. Soon he would be at home where he could take a bath and not worry about anything for the rest of the day.   
  
Truthfully though, at this point in time, none of that mattered in the least.   
  
The most important thing now was peeping.   
  
Nobuyuki stopped in his tracks, and hid behind the nearest tree. Someone was coming his way, and he could hear the faint pitter-patter of feet running across the grass. Looking carefully at the approaching figure, he quickly deduced that it was Tenchi, based on the foolish way in which the young man always seemed to run. Tenchi was a blur as passed by and veered off in another direction, away from the house and toward the far side of the lake.   
  
At first, Nobuyuki didn't have a clue as to what was going on, but he would find out a few seconds later. Squinting as hard as he could, he gazed out across the lake, where, at the other side, he could vaguely make out someone sitting in a tree. The only thing he could tell at such a distance was that the person had very light cyan, almost powder blue, hair.   
  
He immediately jumped to conclusions.   
  
"Ohhhhh, a romantic evening perhaps?" he said to himself softly. "Well Tenchi, you could have picked a better place, but hey, what ever floats your boat. Oh, my wife in heaven, forgive me, but I've got to watch over our son's natural development!"   
  
With that, Tenchi's father slinked back into the forest, hoping that when he finally reached the other side of the lake he'd still be invisible.   
  
Poor Nobuyuki, often times he was too lecherous for his own good.   
  
**  
  
A large tree next to the quiet lake**   
  
Just about out of breath completely, Tenchi Masaki finally reached his destination. He stood now the base of a big oak tree, peering up at Ryoko, who was sitting up on one of the higher branches, almost out of sight. Nevertheless, he could see her up there, sprawled out on the limb gazing at the sky, a strange bottle clenched in her right hand.   
  
For a minute, Tenchi said nothing, and listened quietly to her thoughts.   
  
_"There he is, right on cue,"_ she was thinking, having already sensed his presence. _"He'll likely come up with some excuse for Ayeka. Never mind that she could have killed me! I should be furious at him, but I'm not. He injures me every day almost as much as she does, but I don't hate him at all. Strange..."_   
  
"Hello Tenchi," Ryoko said quietly, without much emotion.   
  
Knowing now that she had acknowledged him, Tenchi vowed to speak with her face to face. Since he couldn't fly like she could, he would have to climb. After one or two failed and embarrassing attempts, he got a good grip on the bark and did his best to scramble up the tree. Tenchi finally reached the top, and sat down next to her on a thick, yet extremely uncomfortable branch.   
  
Her nose wasn't broken anymore, apparently. More than likely she'd used her powers of bodily regeneration to repair the damage, but that didn't necessarily make the inner pain go away.   
  
"Where have you been? We've been looking _everywhere _for you!" Tenchi exclaimed, still panting. "We were so worried that we almost called the police to file a missing persons report!"   
  
Ryoko stirred only a little bit, seemingly unaffected by his words. He realized too late how many times he'd foolishly used the word "we" when he mean to use "I".   
  
"I was underneath the lake most of the time..." she answered.   
  
_"Looking for something to drink, that is..."_ Ryoko thought a second later.   
  
Although Ryoko was humanoid, she wasn't limited by homo sapiens' paltry need for oxygen. Under the cool water she could hide from all her troubles and fears, a place of quiet solitude. It was there, amongst the wreckage of the original Ryo-Ohki, that she had her private stash of alcohol. She wasn't ready to admit it yet, but every time Nobuyuki or Katsuhito gave her some money and sent her into town to buy sake, Ryoko spent fully half of it on herself. Upon returning, she would hide her alcohol in the lake for future use. Later, Ryoko would then tell whoever asked that the remaining sake had been so expensive that she had to spend all the money just to get it.   
  
Princess Ayeka had always been suspicious of her in that regard, but was never able to obtain proof of wrongdoing. The others simply took Ryoko's words at face value, and thought nothing more of it.   
  
Tenchi took a good, long look at the bottle in her hand. It was quite large, and had a lot of strange characters on it that he didn't recognize. He assumed it was Russian, and therefore came to the conclusion that its alcohol content must have been astronomical.   
  
"What is that?" Tenchi asked of her.   
  
"It's vodka," the space pirate answered simply.   
  
"Oh, I see..."   
  
It was plain to see that Ryoko hadn't actually drunk any. The bottle was quite full, and she seemed to be merely fingering it, questioning whether or not to take the plunge. Even with the power to hear what she was thinking, Tenchi didn't have a clue as to where this conversation would go. For a short moment, he was tempted to leave her alone so she could be by herself, since it seemed that's what she wanted. At least that's what his mind was telling him, but his heart was sending a much different message.   
  
"Ryoko…please tell me, how do you feel?" said Tenchi, hoping she would reply.   
  
That finally got her attention. She hadn't heard him ask that question in a one hell of a long time, and now that he had asked, she would oblige.   
  
_"Like shit..."_ Ryoko thought.   
  
"I don't feel very good at all Tenchi," she answered, sounding as if she were restraining herself. "It's not every day that somebody hits me in the nose like she did. It was a cheap shot, and yet it took a lot of guts, I suppose. I don't give a crap anymore though. Over and done with as far as I'm concerned."   
  
For a second, Tenchi mulled over what to say. He didn't have to read her thoughts to know that she was in a state of emotional turmoil and also fragile and vulnerable.   
  
"Well…um, for what it's worth, Ayeka does feel sorry," Tenchi said, trying to put her at ease.   
  
"Is that supposed to make me feel better?" Ryoko answered immediately. "I'm not gonna believe that until it I hear it come out of her mouth!"   
  
_"Son of a bitch, why the hell does he always defend Ayeka? She's a grown woman, so why the hell does she need Tenchi to protect her all the damn time?"_ the depressed pirate thought afterwards.   
  
"Ryoko…I'm not about to defend Ayeka for what she did," Tenchi said, taking advantage of her thoughts. "It was **_very_** wrong for her to lash out at you like that. If Ayeka were here, I'm sure she'd tell you herself, but she's not, so I have to."   
  
At that point, Ryoko's eyes became fiery with anger, and she glared at her beloved Tenchi. Even with his ability to hear her innermost devices, he still seemed to be insensitive and oblivious to her feelings. Ryoko had been in the throes of despair for the past two days, questioning whether or not she could live in the role that the Masaki household had given her.   
  
Tired of the mind games, the fights, and the rejection, she found herself honestly contemplating leaving Okayama, and Tenchi, for good.   
  
**  
  
In a nearby shrub**   
  
Nobuyuki was hiding quietly some distance away, flat on his stomach, in a bush.   
  
In his hands he had a camera, and was taking still photos of Tenchi and Ryoko. He silently wished that he had a video camera, but there hadn't been enough time to run back to the house. It didn't really matter, because he was recording for posterity his son's development in romantic and sexual matters, all privacy concerns having long ago been set aside in his mind.   
  
_"His mother would probably be appalled by this,"_ he thought, _"But I can't stop now, not when today could be the day when our Tenchi becomes a man. Come on, Tenchi, you fool, be a man!"_   
  
Nobuyuki had seen a lot of crazy stuff in his time, but nothing nearly as insane as having a bevy of alien females land on humble little Planet Earth one after the other after the other. He had finally learned to love again, and married Rea, long-time friend of the Masaki family who helped raise Tenchi throughout his childhood after the death of his mother. Then life turned upside down again with the return of Tennyo, his other child with Kiyone, whom he'd hidden knowledge of from Tenchi for a long time. More Juraians kept coming to Earth after that, then all kinds of hooplah surrounding mystical Goddesses, finally ending in more epic space adventures.   
  
Of course, poor Tenchi was placed right in the middle of it all.   
  
It had been a difficult time that translated into a long story, one best suited for individuals who have a lot of time to listen to it. Obviously, the most important thing now was not storytelling, but peeping.   
  
Taking a few more pictures, Nobuyuki took a rest and enjoyed the beauty of the forest in the fading light. He put the camera away and sat up, then proceeded to continue silently observing Tenchi and Ryoko.   
  
All of a sudden, from seemingly of nowhere, he heard a distinctly female voice.   
  
"So, what are we looking at Nobuyuki-san?" the unmistakably childlike voice of Washu quietly said.   
  
"Oh, nothing nothing, I'm just spying on ol' Tenchi again Miss Washu," he whispered off handedly.   
  
"He's with Ryoko, correct?"   
  
"Yup."   
  
"I hope he's not doing anything indecent with my daughter."   
  
"That'd be doubtful. Ya know how much of a wuss Tenchi is when it comes to...y-y-your _daughter?!_"   
  
It was then that Nobuyuki realized that it wasn't a ghost or a spectre that he was carrying on a conversation with, nor was his mind playing tricks on him. He turned, with his mouth gaping wide open, to face the flesh and blood Washu sitting next to him, grinning happily.   
  
He was about to scream loudly and run away, but Washu had already driven her balled fist into the top of his skull, knocking him out almost instantaneously. Nobuyuki hit the ground like a sack of potatoes, a slack-jawed expression frozen on his face. The red-haired scientist used her powers to produce a length of extra strength, high-tension wire rope from another dimension. She proceeded to tie him up until he appeared to be like a caterpillar in a cocoon.   
  
_"Men are pigs…but what can you do?"_ the super genius thought as she grabbed the loose end of the rope   
  
Washu then began to drag him away back towards the Masaki household, where he'd be taken to her lab, thrown in a cage, and be occasionally fed.   
  
If he would be experimented on or not was still up in the air.   
  
Poor Nobuyuki was in for a ride he probably wouldn't ever want to take again.   
  
**  
  
Back in the tree**   
  
"Hey, did you hear something?" Tenchi asked, looking around the area.   
  
"No," Ryoko answered flatly.   
  
"Well, I think I heard something."   
  
"Am I supposed to care?"   
  
Ryoko turned away from him and stared at the bottle of vodka in her hands. It was cold and clear, and she swirled its contents around in order to see the late afternoon light spread out into a dazzling spectrum. The pretty colors calmed her down a good deal, and put things into perspective for her in a way.   
  
"Ugh, never mind that will ya? Let's focus on you and me for the time being," said the pirate firmly. "I was just…so angry at Ayeka, much angrier than I've been in a long, long time. A little space to myself for awhile, that's all I really needed. I'm not going anywhere Tenchi, you know that well enough, so you didn't need to worry about me in that regard. Maybe I just wanted to drown my sorrows away, but I couldn't go through with it, even after I'd wasted so much energy searching for this stuff."   
  
Again, she stared longingly at the vodka. Her body had been telling her that she needed a drink, but her mind and heart were saying something different. Tenchi gently put his hand on Ryoko's shoulder, giving her enough courage to finally confess to him another one of her long kept secrets.   
  
_"I guess he hasn't figured it out yet. Might as well tell him and get it over with..."_ she thought.   
  
"Do you know how long it's been since I've had a drink?" Ryoko asked.   
  
"I...I can't say really. Is this all because of Ayeka? I know she drives you to it sometimes," he answered. "You've said so yourself."   
  
For a moment, she laughed rather heartily at that. Tenchi did hit, right on the button, one of the many factors that drove her to the bottle, but not the main cause. Her mood changed again though, back to the melancholy state she'd been in before.   
  
"In a way it has to do with her. But honestly, it's been about three months since I've had any kind of alcohol," Ryoko admitted. "I used to need it all the time, like it dominated me or something. I was a slave to alcohol, Tenchi, but not anymore…at least, not until now. Here I am, still sober, trying to decide whether or not I want to get drunk. It's usually the opposite, where I'm trying to stop myself from having any more. Odd, isn't it?"   
  
"Heh, yeah, it is kinda strange," replied Tenchi nervously. "What brought this about, all of a sudden?"   
  
"It's kind of a long story," she said. "You remember, don't you? Oh come on, what happened a little over three months ago?"   
  
The look on her face showed that Ryoko expected him to know exactly what she was referring to. She stared at him, in the way that always seemed to whittle his resolve down to nothing.   
  
_"He's forgotten about the cherry trees...I can't believe it!"_ Ryoko's mind cried out.   
  
"I didn't forget about the blossom trees," he replied, responding to her thoughts. "That's a painful memory, and I didn't want to remember it. They were old trees, as close to being ancient as you can get. Then they were gone in a flash. It hurts just to think about it."   
  
On the day in question, Ryoko and Ayeka had already been in the onsen for several hours. It was one of those rare moments where they actually bonded, and one might think that they were starting to become friends. They could be heard singing all sorts of drinking songs, from the most melodious Juraian opera to the simplest, most vulgar pirate limerick.   
  
However, all good days of drunken revelry must come to an end.   
  
When the two girls finally exited the bathhouse, it was quite evident that they were well beyond being toasted. They both went looking for Tenchi, who was still working in the fields. They'd already forgotten the reason why, and seemed to just want to bother him. As always, whenever the two of them were together and the object of their affections was near, it meant that a fight was just waiting to happen.   
  
Tenchi had watched in stupefied horror as the two girls fought against each other with all of their might. Energy beams were flying everywhere, tearing gigantic craters in the ground, putting the young Juraian prince in bodily harm. He hid in the bushes some distance away, hoping to escape the blasts, when to his dismay, he glimpsed Ryoko high in the air, a huge, glowing ball of red plasma in her hands.   
  
She launched it as hard as she could at Ayeka, who was on the ground encased in a personal energy shield. The Princess seemed to be tempting the pirate to unleash her greatest powers, just to prove that she wasn't about to back down any time soon.   
  
Of course, Ayeka did have to be standing less than three meters from the row of beautiful cherry blossom trees that lined the roadway.   
  
In a blinding flash of light, the ground, along with the precious trees, was totally obliterated. Unhurt and none the worse for wear, Ayeka taunted Ryoko and insulted her a little more, and they continued fighting after that without a second thought to what had just happened. Tenchi, on the other hand, was flabbergasted. He stood there speechless, gaping at the charred bark and burning leaves with his mouth wide open.   
  
At last, he finally let out a long, hoarse cry, full of emotion. He began screaming at the two girls at the top of his lungs, dramatically telling them what a horrible things they'd done. When they got a little closer to him, Tenchi noticed the scent of alcohol that seemed to cling to them, and went into a long-winded lecture about the dangers of having too much to drink.   
  
Although she did hear him, for the inebriated Ayeka, everything seemed to go in one ear and out the other.   
  
Ryoko, however, had always been able to hold her liquor better than the Princess, and took every one of his words to heart. It was on that day that she quietly resolved to conquer her alcoholism. Never again did she taste any fermented beverage, even when Ayeka goaded her into a drinking contest. Since the pirate wasn't above cheating, she always won the competitions, and always came out with a hefty sum of money.   
  
"You were so angry with us," she said to Tenchi. "It was like you loved those trees, like you were bonded with them somehow."   
  
"Of course. Grandpa planted one when he and Grandma got married," he replied in a soft voice. "He planted another tree when my mom was born, then another when my mom and dad got married. Then my mom planted a tree when Tennyo was born. My dad planted a tree when I was born too. Those trees represented three generations worth of the Masaki family here on Earth...and we tended them for so long..."   
  
"I'm sorry, Tenchi. I always knew they were precious to you," said Ryoko. "Knowing that my drinking problems caused their destruction was too much. After realizing it, I didn't drink anymore, and I want to keep it that way."   
  
"Don't worry about it, " said Tenchi, smiling warmly at her. "With a good deal of time and patience, they'll grow back. More importantly, how can I help you kick your bad habit for good?"   
  
For a second or two, Ryoko didn't know what to say. She mulled over what to do, weighing different scenarios in her head. Throwing the bottle away seemed like the best idea, but that would be a waste of good liquor. Forgetting about Ayeka, broken noses, and cherry trees for a moment, a wicked thought passed through the mind of the lovely space pirate.   
  
_"Hmmm...if I won't drink it, perhaps my Tenchi can give me that good bit of closure that I so desperately need,"_ Ryoko thought, trying to hide a devious smile.   
  
She handed the bottle of vodka to Tenchi, who stared at her rather oddly before accepting it.   
  
"Why are you giving this to me again?" he asked.   
  
"Just do something with it," she answered, frowning at him a bit. "Dispose of it in whatever way you see fit…"   
  
Ryoko then smiled at Tenchi, mentally willing him to get rid of the accursed bottle. However, the young prince stopped just as he was about to throw the vodka back into the lake. He gazed at it with the same wonder that the pirate had just minutes before, and found that he didn't really want to part with it.   
  
When it came down to it, Tenchi could be the most courageous person there ever was. Unfortunately, whenever he found himself involved with the opposite sex, he became quite the pussywillow. Now, with a bottle of liquid courage in his hands, Tenchi would do something very bold that might finally give him the push he needed to reveal the true feelings he had for Ryoko.   
  
"All right," Tenchi said firmly, "if you wont drink it, then I will."   
  
The lovely humanoid type found herself dumbfounded.   
  
_"He can't be serious about that, can he? Tenchi can't hold his liquor worth shit!"_ Ryoko thought to herself.   
  
"Oh, I'm serious, all right," he answered, mirroring her thoughts. "We'll see just how well I can hold my liquor. Okay, here I go!"   
  
Tenchi performed a feat of strength by ripping the well dug-in cork from the bottle. He swallowed his fear, held his nose, put his lips on the bottle's mouth, and took a big gulp. It burned as the vodka went down his esophagus, and Tenchi winced and began to cough hard as soon as he got his next breath of air.   
  
Again, he looked at Ryoko, who didn't seem impressed. She gazed back at him for a second, then nonchalantly began to examine her fingernails.   
  
"I'm not gonna say a word," she replied, still smugly looking at her hands.   
  
"Fine then," Tenchi answered, "I'll do the talking for the both of us."   
  
_"And the drinking, too,"_ thought the pirate.   
  
"And the drinking, too!" said the Jurai prince.   
  
Ryoko sighed quietly, then smiled and laughed to herself as Tenchi had another swig of vodka. Then, he had another, and another, and another, and another.   
  
Finally, the last rays of the sun had disappeared from the horizon, bathing the Masaki property in the cold embrace of the pale, lonely moon.   
  
A few more devilish thoughts passed through Ryoko's mind, and she knew this was going to be a long night.

**  
End Chapter Six**   
  
**_Chapter Seven Teaser available!_**

_  
  
-Can't you see that you are a pioneer, n__ot one of the endless talkers w__ho tell you the same old rules you've heard before? _

_I can tell that you are a pioneer. __You want to be facing danger, n__ot having to hide your big dreams any more._

_You are a pioneer, the same as me.-_  
  
  
  
Author's note: For anyone who wants to know, the references to characters that haven't yet appeared (e.g. Tennyo, Rea) are new ones that have been introduced in the 14th and 15th episodes of the Tenchi Muyo! OVA series.   
  
Unfortunately, these episodes haven't been released in the U.S. yet, so you have to go to a bunch of Tenchi sites before you can find one that has the story. I'm trying to keep this fic in tune with the OVA as much as possible, so in order to make it believable, it has to be set after the 3rd OVA series, which again, hasn't been released in the U.S. I'm just assuming that Tenchi doesn't choose at the end of the series, but that could very well change at the end of things.   
  
We just have to wait and see. Also the teaser for chapter seven is up. Read it if you dare!   
  
Thank you, dear readers for your patronage and support. Please leave a critique once you've finished reading this.   
  
Peace out,   
  
Lord Augustus


	7. No need for ?

**_Chapter Seven: No need for…?_**

**  
  
The next morning**

****

For some reason, it was a cloudy day. Perhaps it would rain again, and perhaps it wouldn't. Whatever explanation there was for it, the sky was a flat, uninteresting expanse of white.

This was certainly a day to sleep in, and Tenchi felt all warm and snuggly in his bed. The dull white light coming through the windows filled the room with a soothing aura that put the mind at ease. It too was warm, and gave him a wonderful feeling of serenity, something he sorely needed. In the back of his mind he knew he had a hangover, and that knowledge prevented him from moving around very much at all.

Alcohol was something that never sat well with Tenchi. His memory of the night before was foggy at best. The only thing he could recall at the moment was promising himself that he would reveal the truth to Ryoko and telling her he'd help her break her addiction by downing a whole bottle of vodka.

There wasn't much logic in that course of action apparently, because in the end it made him do something he might have regretted.

Several seconds later, Tenchi finally became aware that there was someone else in the room with him. More specifically, someone else was in the bed too, under the covers, and lying on top of him to boot. The painful comprehension of recent events scared the hell out of him, and he went rigid like a board, trying not to breath or make any sounds. He dared not look down to see whom it was, but it didn't matter, because Tenchi already had a good idea as to this person's identity.

She shifted position a bit in his arms, and placed her head on his strong chest, pushing a few strands of cyan hair into Tenchi's face. The girl was bare from the waist up, but she seemed to be wearing a pair of the Juraian prince's boxer shorts. Her long, slender legs were wrapped around his, while her arms were coiled around his shoulders, and she appeared to be cuddling him like an oversized teddy bear. For a second or two she stirred and subconsciously matted down her hair so it wouldn't be in her lover's face, then returned to her original position.

Quite groggy, but also very curious, Tenchi lifted the covers and gazed for a long time at what he saw. Her smooth curvaceous hip lay against his pajama bottoms as her head rested on his chest. Her leg was curled around his and her arms were draped over him as well. It was, by far, the most erotic thing he had ever seen. Confused, Tenchi finally put the covers down and lay there rather flabbergasted.

Realization of what had happened hit Tenchi like a speeding freight train. The memories of their shared passion flooded his mind, sending a hundred different emotions surging through his cerebral cortex. For just a second, he felt guilty and wanted to run away from the problem like he'd done so many times before, but Ryoko was beginning to wake up.

Her amber eyes fluttered open and she gazed at him, smiling warmly.

"Good morning there, lover boy," Ryoko said in a sultry tone of voice.

_"More like lover man, if you ask me,"_ she thought a moment later.

"Good um…good morning there, Ryoko-chan," Tenchi replied, smiling nervously at her.

For a second, the half naked young lady on top of the prince gave a strange look, then rolled off him and onto her back. She put her right arm underneath Tenchi and draped her left over his chest, then turned to face him. Ryoko then put her head on his shoulder and began to whisper into his ear.

"You're the greatest Tenchi, I don't care what anyone says," she told him in a dreamy tone of voice. "Last night was absolutely perfect. It was like you were more inside me than anyone could have possibly been. Just absolutely amazing…"

"Oh, gee…well thank you," he replied, taking it as a compliment.

The voluptuous pirate rolled her eyes and laughed heartily.

"Sorry, but that's not what I meant," Ryoko said to him. "Last night…it was like you read my mind and knew just what I wanted, and then you did it! And you're not exactly a small man either, my Tenchi, so that made it even more incredible!"

Becoming red in the face, the prince could do little more than stare at the girl as she closed her eyes and tried to recall their shared passion. Ryoko had always seemed to be loud and coarse and obnoxious, but now, as she lied quietly in his arms, Tenchi for the first time realized how soft she really was. He also understood that there was now no going back to the way things were now that he'd chosen Ryoko. Life with the girls could become impossible, especially with Ayeka, who was still holding out against all odds that he was in love with her.

Although his mind was still a little cloudy, Tenchi did at least feel happy. He was, after all, in bed with a half naked Ryoko. At the same time however, the prince wished he could remember how he'd professed his love to the pirate. That part of his memory was all a haze, made dark and murky by a bottle of well-aged Russian vodka, but luckily, Ryoko was nice enough to remind him.

"I guess you can hold your liquor better than I thought, my Tenchi," she said to him. "You really know how to sweep a girl off her feet. I oughta get you drunk more often if I can get those type of results!"

_"Who'd ever have thought this guy is such a dynamo?! He started off kinda slow, but then he got into it and was all "I love you, I love you" with every thrust!"_ Ryoko thought a second later, her mind and heart racing. _"Oh, and just the concept! He loves me! Tenchi waited for the perfect moment just like I always knew he would!" _

For a moment or two, the prince still felt great remorse about barely remembering the words that won Ryoko over. Her next thoughts however, erased that from his mind completely. Ryoko couldn't see it, but just then an uncharacteristically smug grin made it's way across Tenchi's face.

_"The man was on fire!" _she thought._ "Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, Tenchi Masaki is a **sex god!**"_

  
  
Note: That's all there is for now, but it's FAR from over. I posted this just to tell everyone that I'm not dead and am still working on the Story. I hoped you all liked it! What kind of crazy stuff is gonna happen to Tenchi now? Who knows, I haven't written it yet.

Here's hoping I get some motivation!

Peace Out,

Lord Augustus


End file.
